What should my style be? What should my diet consist of? What should my children be learning? What should I do to please my husband? How can I earn extra money? How can I save more money? Do you ever feel overwhelmed as a mother?
I recently had an epiphany....unfortunately, it took a series of events to reveal truth in my life, but by sharing this with you, I hope you won't have to learn from similar events. I also hope you realize how important it is to encourage one another as women through all of these decisions and how important just being honest and real with each other is to providing that encouragement.
I could give you examples of what I believe are "fronts" from women I have encountered or stories I have heard that make me think there are people out there purposefully discouraging one another to make themselves feel more powerful.....OH we all could share those stories! BUT! That would be negative gossip so instead, I will spill the beans about some days in my life that I am SURE will make you feel like Wonder Woman!
Let's see...where to begin? How about just today, when I didn't get much accomplished other than crying in my husbands office over ...well basically, over selfishness. I don't need to give you details of our argument, but he presented an idea to me, I agreed, but disagreed and instead of just going with the flow, I took control and made an argument out of nothing. I stayed calm, but after 15 years of marriage, he can identify my calm-clam from my angry-calm. Picking up on the angry, maybe he got more upset than he wanted to. We finally ended on a good note and all is well....as it obviously always does or I wouldn't be able to say, "15 years of marriage." My point is, we argue! We love each other deeply and I cannot imagine my life without him, but we won't stop arguing!
What else? Oh, all of those yummy home made meals I have/will blog about! I actually DO cook 3 meals a day...MOST of the time. There are nights when I don't feel like cooking, though. I have even had something thawed out to cook for dinner and decide at the last minute that I just don't want to cook. That's lazy....its ok (I guess)..but its lazy! On those nights, as bad as I hate to say it, we eat at Wendy's or order pizza. It's gross and I feel guilty, but it won't stop happening.
I have chore lists made for everyone and a 2 week menu with snacks included laminated on my wall in pretty paper. Everyone who comes to my house is "impressed by how organized (I) am." I quickly correct them telling them that I don't enforce those chores! I don't stick to that menu! Geez, I rarely ever even LOOK at them! HA! Sure, once or twice a week I will tell the kids to go do what is on their chore list. Occasionally, I will look at the menu I made for an idea of what to cook....but that's it. My goal is to use them fully.....someday. I probably won't and that's ok because...
Last, but CERTAINLY not least, this morning, after my shower, I changed my shirt.....a shirt that I had been wearing for 36 hours...LOL! Its one of my "nicer" t-shirts but it is super comfortable! I slept in it, then when I showered the next day, I decided it would be fine to continue to wear it with my denim shorts....then at bedtime I decided it was ok to just change back into my pj pants and continue the wear of said shirt. I want to add a funny tidbit to this confession: As I snuggled on the couch with my husband last night watching t.v. he kept putting his nose on my head and deeply inhaling. This is NOT normal for him. I don't think he has ever purposefully SMELLED me before! I started to become self conscious about it(yes the girl in the same shirt for 36 hours has some sense self-awareness) after the 2nd time. The 3rd time he did it, I asked him why he was doing it. "Do I stink?!" He said no in a way that made me think he thought I actually smelled quiet nice to him (thank you pheromones!), so I slept in the shirt again! HAHA!
Is that normal?
Oh I could go on and on about my mishaps, disagreements, and dirty clothes, but the point of it all is to make you feel better about yours. Nobody is perfect! You hear this all the time. What you don't hear is that we are all trying to be perfect anyway! It's not achievable so relax!
Learn form your mistakes, laugh about your short comings, be humble about the things that go wrong in your life by sharing them with others...not in a spirit of complaining, but in the spirit of encouragement!